Stop and Stare
by GASPLudwig
Summary: "You don't think much of me, do you?"..."Don't be silly,love. I don't think of you at all." Sirius X OC X Regulus.
1. Stop and Stare

Stop And Stare

I couldn't Breathe.

Couldn't move, couldn't think.

All I could do was stare into his eyes.

The eyes I've seen millions of times. I've seen them in my dreams too many times to count. Every time I close my eyes, it's as if his are starring back at me.

We were falling. Free falling. We twisted oddly, fell smoothly, never breaking the eye contact that I've known so well.

There was no particular end in sight. Just a never ending fall.

Yet oddly, it was alright with me. I was calm. As if it didn't matter. As if the certain death awaiting me when we finally landed with a huge splat all over the hard, cold ground that awaited us, didn't really matter. Because he was there. Him and his eyes.

And even though I was already falling, I had a feeling he would catch me.

"This war is just getting started, Hayden." My father stated one morning, taking the coffee cup from his lips and looking over my shoulder at the news paper on the table in front of me. It read, in bold black letters:

**Ten Muggle-borns killed in the last three weeks.**

"It's horrible." I mumbled, my brow crinkling at the paper as my father's head snapped in my direction.

"Filthy things, those muggle-borns. I'm glad someone's doing something about them." He sent me a threatening look as he took another sip of his coffee and snatched the paper from in front of me, holding it in front of him and reading it slowly.

"They're just as bad as the muggles are." My mother chimed in, sipping slightly from her tea cup and pushing a lock of white-blond hair behind her ear. She glanced at me shortly when I didn't respond, giving a quick, "Sit up straight, dear, or you'll have a hump when you're older" before sniffing and looking back down into her tea cup.

I sat up taller and pushed my hands under my thighs, thinking about how I should really get changed out of this nightgown, and into something more suitable for my first day of sixth year. Apparently, my mother had the same idea.

"Hayden. What ARE you wearing? Be quick and go get dressed. And tell Lucius we're waiting for him."

I jumped at the opportunity, sliding from the chair and hurrying up the steps. If there was one person I hated, it was Lucius. Not just because he was my older brother, but because it seemed that every damn time I tried to do something that mother would approve of, he found a way to mess it up.

"If we don't end this war," I heard him saying heatedly to Regulus Black through the crack in his door, "This war will end us."

Regulus- who never really did talk much- answered shortly with, "All of us." And then his eyes swung over to the door where he could just about see me peeking in. I cringed, knowing what was coming next. He would tell Lucius, and I'd get hexed into oblivion, but it never came, only a sigh from Lucius. I watched him run a hand over his face and stare at Regulus half heartedly.

"All of us?" Lucius repeated, grimacing and taking a seat on his bed, pulling shoes on. "Who've you got to loose? No one, that's who." Lucius snapped, lacing up his right foot.

Regulus' eyes met mine again, and I thought that this time for sure he was going to rat me out. But he surprised me again, turning back to my brother un-phased and answering shortly, "Someone."

I felt my heart beating faster and rushed away from the door. What was it about those eyes that seemed so incredibly familiar? Such a deep grey…

I hurried into my room and changed into a short black dress quickly before pulling my hair up loosely and frowning at myself in the mirror. "You really shouldn't be listening in on his conversations." Regulus Black stood leaning against my dark oak doorframe, looking as passive as ever. I was all too aware that his simple sentence was the most he's ever spoken to me. Not to mention that he could see my plain, dark bedroom, along with a pile of children's books I kept in the corner. I would have blushed…if I wasn't a Malfoy.

Rolling back my shoulders, I shifted through my drawers, and glanced at him shortly.

"You act as if I care what he talks about."

He walked around my bed, finally coming to stand beside me. His hand grabbing onto the dresser next to mine. I spared him a glance and went back to searching through my clothes until I found what I was looking for. A silver scarf. I wrapped it around my neck softly, turning to walk away, but he was standing directly in my way.

"You don't think much of me, do you?" He asked, a brow raised pointedly. I fought to not start drowning in those all too familiar eyes.

"Oh, Don't be silly, dear." I let a smirk slip onto my face, moving around him and towards the door. "I don't think of you at all."


	2. This is War

**A/N~ Just wanted to say a quick thank you to those who reviewed and favorited/Alerted the last chapter. It's probably one of the shorter ones, just to give out a sort of opening for the story. **

Chapter Two~ This is War

King's Cross Station was buzzing with talk of the new school year. You wouldn't even guess that a war was starting. Friends jumped at each other, Girls squealed, guys shook hands and hugged, parents kissed their kids goodbye, but my family stood completely still in the middle of it all. My father's back was pressed against the tall brick pillar, but he made sure to not lean on it at all, and my mother stood next to him, sending cold looks around the platform.

Regulus had gone to find his family, and Lucius was standing beside me like a hawk, shooting a warning look at anyone who even glanced my way. "Don't ever go near them, Hayden. They're up to no good." I was startled by his words, following his gaze to a group of four boys who were all staring at me.

I wanted to argue. I wanted to fight and say the Marauders were the good ones. The only ones who were up to good. I wanted to tell him that Sirius Black was the lucky one out of the two brothers. And though I'd never admit it, and still pretend to be the perfect pure-blood daughter, I envied him. But instead, I nodded shortly and uttered an "Of course." before he could think twice about my delayed answer.

"Gawd, have you seen James Potter this year?" One girl gushed to her friends as they walked past, bouncing giddily on their heels.

"James? What about Sirius? I mean…" They were too far away to hear now, and for that I was thankful. I sucked in a deep breath and looked up at my parents. Their heads were held high, and their gaze never bothered to drop to meet mine.

"We should get going." Lucius muttered, looking after the girls who were talking about two of the Marauders. He grabbed my hand and led me away towards the train.

"If you ask me," I started, a grin slipping onto my face as I looked up at him, "Remus is the REAL winner." Lucius shot me a warning look, telling me that I had no sense of humor and I really should learn how to make a proper joke.

"Lighten up, Malfoy." Regulus nudged my brother, coming to hurry down the train's corridor behind us. "It was just a joke." he chuckled, peeking at me as if to make sure it really was a joke. A gave him a small smile.

"Honestly, Malfoy." I mocked, skipping ahead into a compartment where Narcissa and Bella sat talking quietly, "Learn to take a joke." Narcissa giggled softly when I came in, standing up to pull me into a hug.

Bella didn't move.

"It's okay, Bella." Regulus let the smallest of smiles slip on his face. It was rare to see any emotions on his face. "Don't get up." He continued, jokingly. She lifted her chin higher, and turned to look out the window as we started moving. I sat next to Narcissa and watched over her shoulder as she switched through the pages of this weeks Teen Witch Weekly.

{Sirius Black's Point Of View}

There she was again.

Walking around the courtyard like she owned the damned thing. We hadn't been at Hogwarts five minutes, and everyone was already staring at her. My brother followed behind her like a duckling, but she didn't pay him any mind. She never really did.

Her blond hair was pushed behind her ears, and her sparkling eyes observed her surroundings like she was the queen and everyone else were her servants.

"Oi," James called loudly across the way, closing his fingers around the gold snitch and stuffing it into the pockets of his jeans. Eyes darted from all over to land on the lot of us, James' smirk growing as he realized he had everyone's attention. "I didn't know St. Mongos let people out before they were cured, Hayden."

Her gaze shot over to us, her eyes connecting with James for a split second before she turned back around and kept walking, a small smile lighting up her face. What the hell was going on in that head of hers?

"Well, she's no fun." James scoffed, laying back down onto the grass of the courtyard as everyone went back to what they were doing before his outburst. Remus gave him a reproachful look before continuing with his book, rolling his eyes at the other Marauder.

"Let it go, mate." I chuckled, running a hand through my hair and sending a wolfish grin over to the group of Hufflepuff's on the bench in the corner. They turned away in giggles as James sat back up and hung his head. "The last thing you need is Lily thinking you're interested in that Slytherin."

"Oh, don't act like you don't think she's gorgeous." James shot, peeking at him through his hair, "You and every other bloke at this school."

"Come off it. The best you can do is focus on the things you do best." I grinned, straightening out my tie and standing, Remus doing the same. "Torturing Snivillus, and making Evans fall for you."

"Never gonna happen." Lily smirked, brushing past them and into the castle. I just rolled my eyes, glancing back over my shoulder at the sound of a light laugh. I watched Hayden Malfoy through the window as she threw her head back, a laugh erupting out of her as she slapped her hand against Regulus's chest.

"You're drooling again, Sirius."


	3. Emery and Muffins

Emery was probably the only person at Hogwarts that really knew me. That is, the whole me. The me that I was at home: soft spoken, polite, pureblooded. And the me at Hogwarts: loud, clumsy, and a total screw up, yet still managing to keep my cool. Which is probably the only reason I agreed to skipping the opening dinner and opting for an evening of talking to him by the black lake instead. You could always find him out here, even in the cold, or the rain. None of it really seemed to bother him. But man, he really loved this lake.  
>I walked to the lake, spotting him immediately. Honestly, he was impossible to miss. He stood about six feet tall, his black hair sticking out all over the place, and his slender body oddly bony. It was easy to see why no one really talked to him. Except me, that is.<br>"Having fun, Em?" I shouted to him, but I don't think he even heard me. He just keeps staring out at that damned lake.  
>"How're things at the Malfoy residence?" he had this thing of talking in what sounded like old English. As if he was from a hundred years ago. I smiled.<br>"Fine, love. How's your sister? Good I hope. Last time I saw her she was still using you as a walking stick."  
>"She's gotten big. Walking on her own now. You'll have to come visit." after he says this, he finally looks at me. Simultaneously, we burst into a fit of hysterics. It was something I just couldn't explain, because nothing funny was actually said, but it was a force of habit I guess. Something only good friends could really do.<br>"I missed you."  
>I grin like a cat at his words. "Missed you too, Em."<br>He wraps me I his arms, pulling me flush against him.  
>It's times like this that I'm glad I have him. No questions, no explanations. No reasons. No expectations. No pressures. Just friendship.<br>"This is the year." he exclaims, a giant smile spreading across his face. He turned towards the lake, keeping me tucked under one arm as he scans the horizon. "This is the year I'm finally gonna see that damned giant squid."  
>I laugh at this, because I've offered more than one for him to come down into the Slytherin commonroom and look out one of our windows for the squid - because our commonroom was located beneath the black lake. But as an honorary Ravenclaw, he refused.<br>Emery was a confusing guy really. He often had that dazed sort of day dreaming look; but I could never guess what he'd been thinking about. I hear bad things about him though. About his family being horrible muggles, and him staying up at all hours of the night wandering the castle. This, I question, is odd since he's never had a detention and therefore has never been caught. I guess that's what drew me to him. We both had rumors circulating about us. Except he was made out as a sob story adventurer, and me as a heartless Malfoy. Both of which, I suppose, were true in a sense.  
>He heaves a big sigh as it begins to get dark, and throws his head back to catch the last bits of sun.<br>"Where's all those Slytherins you follow?" Emery asks and turns us to walk back to the castle, removing his arm from me. He doesn't say things to intentionally hurt or annoy me, but I feel my stomach pang at the comment. I'd tried to have talks with him before about a filter between the mouth and the mind, but he doesn't see the use of one.  
>I roll my eyes at him and groan despite how much I want to scream at him and tell him they're NOT my Slytherins, and they follow ME around, and not the reverse. Instead I shrug and jump up to kiss his cheek before we part ways halfway to the castle.<br>I never came out and said anything to Emery about what my friends would say if they knew we were friends. He just kind of always knew it. If anything, I think he had the same dilemma. I mean, the only people he really talked to were Frank Longbottom and That Alice girl that I once hexed in DADA by accident. In short, they're not my biggest fans. I always wonder if the only reason I even like Emery is because I know my brother would disapprove.  
>Coughing to make my head clearer, which didn't really make much sense, I straightened my shoulders and walked with new purpose toward the castle. I really needed to grab a bit to eat before I had to retire to my room with Bella and Cissa. Bella kept to herself most of the time, But Cissa had this notion that we were best friends, which I never really thought about much until last year when I realized she had gotten me a very expensive Christmas present and I had gotten her nothing again.<br>By the time I reached the castle; I was cursing myself. The halls were scattered with students heading back to their dorms, which meant my yearning stomach was about to be the end of me.  
>"Don't worry." a deep voice said quietly from behind me. I felt a big muffin slide into my hands and looked up to see Regulus standing there, the rest of my friends and brother filling in around me. "I covered for you." he says, but his face remains blank. I feel my cheeks burn at his words, and look around at my friends to see if anyone noticed. When I looked back at Regulus, he had turned away from me and was in a conversation with Lucius. Did he know about Emery? If he did, why wasn't he ratting me out yet?<br>I look at him again and narrow my eyes. Blackmail, I decide immediately. It's gotta be blackmail.


End file.
